It’s uncomfortable thinking I am the only one sometimes. The only one that doesn’t drink. The only one that doesn’t eat shit. The only one that doesn’t like pretending to be cool. The only one that is sick and tired of the show and the parade. The only one that doesn’t feel like they measure …
Yes, of course, this connects to the obvious: I am falling in love with a man, only in real life and not in theory. Like, I’m experiencing the kind of relationship where I think: pinch me, is this really the person I’m partnered with today and on the same page with in both short and …
I’m being too healthy? What does that even mean? Somebody just said that to me in the elevator after I left the gym. Somebody else said that to me at lunch looking at what was on my plate- the same shit that’s on my plate at home. I have food in my bag in case …
I’m an adult. I realize I have been an adult, on paper, and by most societal standards, for a long time. I’m 33. I’ll be 34 in May. I have had my shit together for a very long time: in business, with most of my money, staying sober, easing my way into being kind to …
If we want self-esteem, we must do esteemable acts. If we want to reduce our fear, we must take action and walk through it. If we want to feel better- about ourselves, in our skin, physically, emotionally, however, then we must act our way into it. It is our human nature not to do the …
The mind is seductive. It’ll pull you in from anywhere, for any reason, at any time. It’ll convince you that you’re not doing enough, that you’re not OK in the space that you occupy and that you should be doing something else. The mind is sexy. It sounds real. It sounds true. It even sounds …
I was good, until I looked at you, and I looked at your outsides. I was good, until I compared myself to you all, and to all of your “glitter”. I was good, until I got dragged along by my tiredness, instead of dancing along with the gratitude I knew I felt waking up this …
I thought I was mad. I thought I was fat. I thought I had to change a routine that’s been working for me for some time now. I thought I had something to fix. About myself, about my circumstances, about the shit I think I see and have something to do about. But I wasn’t, …
I really am the problem. I am my irritation. I am my anger. I am my paralysis by analysis. I am my fear. I am the only version of the truth as I can see it, and all of the formerly mentioned are simply extended versions of that truth, in the moment. Me being the …
Just keep going. I have thought a lot about this over the last few days, as the pull is to “start over” with the all too familiar New Year’s resolutions. I don’t want that anymore. I don’t want to keep resolving to do things differently- I want to keep going. I want to tweak some …